Deep down my heart ....

Deep down my heart there is something that is still hidden that has made its permanent place there without giving any rent..One day a tear dropped down my eye and I asked why it came..it says "I have no place inside you". Tht's how I am.I do not let tears to come reside in my eyes.After a long time I thought of continuing to pen up for my online diary. Many a few incidents happen to take place during last few days tht are worth writing here but I can't give hand to those moments for the time being.
I never need anyone in my life (except very very few).Dont even care for anyone who doesnt care for me.Even sometimes I think do I really take life seriously....NEver I guess. I met lots of new ppl here and the best part is that they all are the birds of a feather flock together. None is of my type .... who doesnt care for the world but they do.I almost forgot my past n even I m trying hard to forget it as soon as possible because there is nothing for me in the past where I lost almost everything for silly reasons. It is not the end of life if u dont get something in the way might be u can get something better thn it if u continue.....LIFE MEANS MOVE ON AND ON.
Bangalore a most happening place in india who is slowly making me insane n addicted to be part of it.A place where I am really happy without a reason. So many things are against me but still they are lesser thn my happiness n satisfaction.First thing I dont see someone here whom I can't even seee in my dream.I dont have to change my route for anyone. I dont have to miss my office 4 someone. I dont have to be senti for someone. I dont have to fight with soemoene.I dont have to take other words to my heart tht they really dont mean.I really dont want to get myself involved with someone here whom I Can't leave in 10 minutes.Yes I can leave anyone in my life who is not of my type and evn I do expect the same from the other end.Why to say YES if you have to say NO.
Perfect match U will never find.At one or the other point of time u will have to compromise it but I dont think I would ever compromise with anyone.I'm the best according to me and the person has be like me who can realise tht I am the best.Then only this two way crawler life will search like a google search engine with mozilla.
Somebody asks my salary..somebody asks if I am married.. somebody asks my height.. somebody asks if I am virgin.. somebody asks me if I have a GF.. somebody asks something nonsense. If they think this is the right parameter to judge a person let them do so I hardly care.I have my own life I can even talk to myself I Can even even stay alone for rest of my life.Do I really need anyone in my life?
I dont take life seriously and it is a fact.Recently I found it is a fun for me but might be for others it is not.Here I was wrong .I'm always free if u ask me to come at ne time if I say ne time then I mean it...I would come but 4 others it is not so.They might have some other commitment in life n no1 has right to question abt the integrity. Though I'm fed up with these online ppl but u know one thing they are in a way better than ur real ppl atleast even if they hurt u U wont get hurted and one thing abt them is like at any point of time we can stop without disturbance.We expect something more.Perhaps our expectations are unmet? The expectations that we are better off not having in the first place.
Then again, why would that necessarily be a criteria, if we were able to converse freely with people without the same mindset, even as soon as we meet them?
Neway there are lots for me to write but time wont stop for me. N it doesnt permit me to write more cuz this is the time for me to work now.But deeeeeeeeeep down my heart I have still many thoughts which are craving for words to come out.....
VInod